Of Pain and Cupboards
by kurosakiLenalee
Summary: Young Naruto's life in the orphanage.  Abuse and neglect.  Short one shot; first Naruto fan fic.


**Naruto one shot. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto we would know a lot more about his past and dark side…**

Of Pain and Cupboards

It hurt. Every time the villagers looked it hurt. Not only the villagers, but the ones in charge of the orphanage as well. Ever since Naruto was about an half an hour old he had been an orphan. Of course he was under the guardianship of the Hokage, but he was a busy man with a village to rebuild, wars to stave off in their weakened position, and an Uchiha clan plotting rebellion. There was a lot on his plate and little time to devote to a small child who could be taken care of by others. If only he knew what the phrase "take care of him" meant to everyone else.

By the time Naruto was 2 he knew to only speak when spoken to, hide, and avoid all adults. The big man in charge who liked to yell would always look at him with eyes of pure hatred. The thin lady that helped and cooked would also glare at him whenever she caught sight of him and whisper "_Monster_." Once he had made the mistake of asking why his bowl was so much smaller then everyone else's. That had earned him a slap across his whiskered cheeks and no food for the next four days until he learned to be grateful for what he did get. He never questioned it again. For some reason he stayed smaller than all the other children who had enough energy to run and play outside.

When Naruto turned three he had learned to hide from the other children as well. Through observation of the adults, they had learned that Naruto was different and they were not supposed to like him. They too had heard the whisperings and adopted them wholeheartedly. Whenever something went wrong they would chorus "The monster did it!" Thus the physical pain began to extend from just hunger. At first it was just a slap, the loss of more meals, or menial labor; but by the time they realized Naruto would not complain or talk back, they decided more drastic measures where needed in order to get the point across. The point was that nothing Naruto did would be enough to repay whatever wrong he had done. Not just the broken items the others blamed him for, but something he had done before he had even arrived. He had no idea what it was, but it must have been terrible. It must have been monstrous.

The fourth year was the worst. The chores had become insurmountable and the food miniscule. "Why?" "Because you deserve it. It's all your fault. Now get to work!" He had started collapsing at least once a day and was beaten for it. Once he had enough and spoke back. "I can't! It's too much! Why don't you do it?" That had been the last straw for the stony adults. He was locked in solitary confinement and left for dead; at least that's what it seemed like to the abandoned child. The cupboard was small, musty, and had no light. The wall kept closing in on him and the dark was trying to strangle him. There was a scary voice that he kept hearing in the back of his mind. It told him to give into the dark… He would be free if he just gave in… That was the scariest aspect.

This cupboard became his new room. He would be returned to it every night and shut up into the recesses of his mind. Every night the voice would return. It sounded like it wanted to eat him! 'Why would it want to eat a toothpick? Shouldn't it want to eat that Udonbo kid who always stole from everyone else's lunches? He's at least four times as big as me! What have done to this thing I can hear? Did I hurt it before I came to the orphanage too? I should be able to remember doing something this aweful! Stay away! Don't eat me! Let me out of here!'

Finally the Hokage came by for his annual visit. The adults did not even have to threaten Naruto to keep him quiet about the on goings of the orphanage. Despite that, this time Naruto's spirit was hanging on by a mere thread. He had been so close to letting that strange red creature get him out of that cupboard. Sandime was in a hurry but he was not stupid. Naruto's size and health had been explained away previously as bad health he was recovering from. This time, it was obvious Naruto's mental state was as bad as his physical state. After much coaxing with the other adults not present the great Hokage, leader of the strongest of the five most powerful countries in the world was only able to get three words out for the frail, broken, shadow of a boy. "I a monster."


End file.
